Well...well...well

It's still here...hmmm

Whatever....

Ya, Happy Valentines Days... now that's out of the way...let's focus on something really important and that is buggin the crap out of me...

Karla Homolka became a mother..

For those of you who don't know who Karla is (you obviously aren't from around here) here is a link of info for you to get to know the new mother...KARLA

How is that poor little baby going to grow up...
Even let's say, for the sake of argument, Karla is a surprisingly great mother - highly doubt it - but if she is, that kid is still soooooo screwed....

You look up to your parents as role models, reflections of who you are and could be....good and bad....
You gage your self acceptance on what people think of you and your family...
EVEN if you are given the tools and support to look outside of your family, the truth still remains that his "mother" raped and killed her own sister, kidnapped, raped, tortured, and murdered others...

And let's just for a moment look at who the father of this child is - What the hell was he thinking??? What would be the appeal of this woman???
This part is fascinating because human nature is soo intriguing
There is no way that this guy was not aware of her past so why would you want a relationship with her??? What type of a guy does this make him - a saint or sicko???
I suppose to some, hopefully a very small some, her twisted past may make her an exciting fuck... but then to start a family?? Christ, who knows, maybe they never planned on the child... (now that just opens up another issue I have with unplanned pregnancies...let's just walk away from that for now)

I know the families of her victims are outraged and rightly so...but I just can't help thinking about that poor innocent baby - although she created his life she ultimately will ruined his life, intentionally or not.....

Motherhood is a privilege - just because you can birth a baby doesn't mean you should.....

Okay, steps off soapbox now....

Moody....

This is my blog....
I am in a mood...

This is what I need right now....



And most definately this.....



But what make today all better would be lunch with Peter.....

(This post is not intended to make any sense to anyone other than myself)

Beauteous day in the land of ice and snow.......

The boy and I spend the afternoon skating at the neighbour's ice rink...BRR...
Typical Canadian weekend activity of course....

I really have to sign him up for hockey next year - been putting that off (for a bizillion reasons) but I think the time has come that I have to put aside my reservations and give into my cultural duty as a canuck...

I remember my father making a rink in our backyard and me skating around til dark... pretending I was the next Dorothy Hamill...and I would have been too if it wasn't for the introduction of boys... and volleyball.... which steered me from my ice skating destiny...really...uh hun....

I even had all my routines choreographed out as well as music selected -
Elton John's Funeral For a Friend, or Chariots of Fire, or Neil Diamond's Hello Again - Yes, this was the early '80's people....

Anyhow here are some pics from today's....who knows you may be witnessing the first photos of the next Wayne Gretzky (god, I hope not)

BRR..and bras...

Holy mother of god I've been freezing all day today
It actually was "warm" today compared to the last few days but for whatever reason I've been "chilled to the bone" all day long...

When I got to work this morning, bitchin' about how cold I was, my co worker (nemesis) politely pointed out that I wouldn't be half as cold if I wore a hat and some pants....
Thank you mother ... I don't wear hats - ever heard of hat head dumbass, and well as for the pants... I was clothed...just in a stupid skirt

I don't normally wear skirts in the dead of winter but I really need some new clothes... it was the skirt or my pj pants....

You see I have recently lost some poundage and am in need of some new clothes that fit (stress does have some good side effects)

Anyhow back to the clothing dilemma - not really interested in buying any new clothes at this time so my wardrobe is quite limited - hence the skirt...

I do have to get some new bras - not necessary cause of any weight loss there (thank god) but just feeling a little less than "lifted and separated"... the dinners are a bit droopy.....
yes, I did just say "dinners" - that is what my grandmother would call the lady lumps
I remember asking why she called them dinners when I was younger and she simply replied that is where the kittens got their dinner from (meaning the momma cat's teats - not hers) - enuf said... god I miss my gram, I can hear her while watching tv "now look at that lady with her dinners all hanging out like that!"

Well I think I will end this boring little post with some music...my most favouritest(word?) song right now - enjoy



Oh yeah - just a heads up - there will be no post tomorrow - good tv night

I have a question...

So tonight I've been surfin blogs...well cause I wanted to - and god knows nothing is going on around here....

I was just hitting that next blog button but then it was going to blogs that were stupid, written in squiggles, or didn't have the next blog button at the top, sooooo I was getting a bit perturbed so I decided to just hit on the people that have left comments on my pathetic blog and check out the people they linked to their blogs

Now some were really interesting and I would like to check back and read again but now I won't remember where they are and where I found them soooooooo
my question is do I ask the blogger if can link them to my blog - honestly for easy access for me to find again - or do I just link them without asking - what is the proper linking protocol???

I always feel like a tool leaving comments on blogs that don't relate to their post but I suppose I should ask right?? I don't think I would want people linking me to their blogs without me knowing... or maybe I wouldn't care... I don't know...

Oh yeah, and do I let the person know how I found their blog....cause I may have found their blog from some other blog that I've never commented on and then would that original blogger's feeling be hurt cause I didn't' comment on their blog but opened their links....like looking for something better - would that be like dating the guy to get closer to the friend??? (not that I ever did that.....)

Oh I'm tired now...forget it

Oh again - if you have one of those sitemeter things on your blog and see that I was on your blog for like 3 hours I was probably just reading all the other links (god, should I have I told you that?)

Three in a row....

FUCCCCCC....
Today really kicked my ass....

Don't get me wrong...love my job...but today... TOO MUCH...too F-'in much...

Ever had a job where no matter what you did you were screwed... if I bring the kids into care I'm in shit.. if I don't bring the kids in I'm in shit... middle management... it really is the most stressful place to be.. I realize that this totally doesn't make sense to anyone outside of my office, but bear (or is it bare?? - ha) with me....

So I actually get out of work alive and then come home to my life par deux - the husband has spent the afternoon with his OT worker making tacos for dinner - wow you all exclaim - he is making tacos - what a feat - is he fine grinding the flour for the tortillas and making the salsa from scratch???

One would think since it is taking an Occupational Therapist coming into our home and working with him for almost 2 hours to complete the dinner making task tonight..

Well no - he opened the box of the taco kit - see here



And now I'm suppose to throw him a parade....

Wow... that is so cold Maybe - poor guy died this summer - he has a brain injury - cut him some slack right???

YOU FUCKIN LIVE WITH HIM THEN!!!

No, seriously, he is not that brain damaged that he can't make tacos on his own...
His issues have nothing to do with the after effects of his brain injury - it's his new diagnosis.... LAZYITIS...

I'm sure that none of the above post makes any sense to anyone so I call it a day now and bid you all adieu...
(but kudos to me for 3 post in a row - woot hooo)

Let's share some stupid information today....

1. Ate half a jar of olives today for lunch (mmm..)

2. Fantasized about cleaning the toilet with the husband's toothbrush today
(so close)

3. Thinking of colouring my hair red with blond chunky highlights (so girly)

4. Thinking about taking the boy to Medieval Times next month (so boyish)

5. I have an inappropriate crush on the husband's cardiologist (swoon)

6. Put my co-workers chair in the elevator when she left the office (office pranks for points)

7. TV sucks on Mondays

Now lets share some pics...

One day my house won't look like the show room for
Hot Wheels/Matchbox/Tonka....and I will miss it.... terribly......

It's been awhile...

Gawd - I'm not even sure what to write - it's been awhile eh kids...

Well, I think I'm gonna start by saying the husband is alive but not well....
Many, many, many, problems over here in my world but let's not focus on that....
Let's just pretend for a moment that everything is different and I'm livin' in my happy place...

No serious shit here today - let's talk about some fluff...

Let's see....um...really like the new Damien Rice and Ben Harper is rockin my world lately....
Went to the gym yesterday - first time in like FOREVER - didn't kill me...
Been reading some really good books lately....
Um...starting to like yogurt...um...um...
Hate football....

Ugh this post sucks...maybe try later....

Hi Kids...

Guess what I did this week.....Nope keep guessing... well aside from eating my weight in "fun size" chocolate bars and mini bags of chips - love Halloween - I....well I should say We...as in me and the husband.....updated our Wills and finalized Power Of Attorneys for each other - romantic aren't we.....

Well, you see I kinda lost my mind on Wednesday when I found out the husband was not following his new "healthy" lifestyle...I decided that I will never ever be put in the situation of not having me and the boy "taken care of" in the event of my husband's demise - yes I was not completely prepared when he "died" this summer and since he does not seem to take what has happened to him seriously (you know the dead part, brain injury or not) then I can only control what I can and I'll be damned if I will be left high and dry when he "drops" next time - and when that time comes you can be assured that he will not be so lucky again as to be given a second chance...

Wow.... I know that sounded harsh but realistically I am one frustrated, scared, TIRED, and overwhelmed woman who is not ready to be a widow......

Hope you all had a good week and are feeling the bulge of Halloween

Hey there

Well I'll be damned....

Just for shits and giggles I thought I would check into the old blog world and low and behold....people have still been checking in here...wow

Thanks for all the kind comments and caring emails I have received in the last few months...they were a super surprise and much appreciated

Things are still really shitty around here but one must focus on the positives right....right?....right...

The husband will be discharged from the hospital to our home on Thursday and then the real fun will begin I guess....

He has made incredible gains in the last few weeks and things are much more optimistic but he will still have a long road ahead of him...having an anoxic brain injury and surviving a cardiac arrest are a tough combo in the rehab world....

Thanks again for all the well wishes....take care of yourselves....

I'll leave you all with this recent pic of the boy from our trip to a country corn maze.... We took the husband for an afternoon LOA from the hospital to enjoy some of the most beautiful fall weather...I'd like to title this photo.... "Children of the corn"......

In a moment......

In a moment your life can forever change....

On August 23, while playing baseball, my husband suffered a massive heart attack which resulted in an anoxic brain injury....

In a moment everything changed....

Things are very surreal and very complicated right now and I really don't think that this blog is the appropriate vehicle for my rants and babbling...

For those who have sent me emails wondering where the hell I've been - this is why I've been away... and probably will remain gone for now.... I got nothing to amuse anyone with right now....

Take care and take care of those you love because in a moment all that you know and think you know can easily be gone...

Is this week over yet??

My apology for my last post on Tuesday....sometimes that place just really kicks me in the ass...

Had a much better day today with the clients....not so much of a great day with a friend...don't much want to elaborate on that one just yet though ...other than anyone have a good ending story about bone cancer...anybody??

But ANYHOW....let's just put all of that crap of our heads right now and enjoy a few giggles - everyone needs a giggle now and then...(a boat load would work wonders right now)

Let's be lovin' on the hottest and funniest man alive right now - kisses to Dane...



This has always been my all time fav little ditty by the much cleaner but funny as hell Jim.....



Whew...feeling better now...

This posts for you.......

To everyone but the ass who drove me crazy today at work just ignore this post - just needing to let some shit fly here right now...

To the son of a bitch client who just doesn't get it.......

Newsflash jerkoff - the world does not revolve around you and your needs.....

We may be a crisis centre but believe it or not you are not the only person in this whole frickin' world that may need us right now...

You see you live in a community of over 320 000 people and we service not only these 300 000 or so we also have to accommodate the needs of people in our rural areas as well...soooooo....that's alot of people.....

We have the capacity to only house a very few children in the program nightly and believe it or not (look at above number) you are not the only person that feels that they need to have their kids stay with us....

Perhaps the mother who is undergoing chemo treatments, or the family currently living at the shelter, or maybe, just maybe, the kid who was feeding his dead mother hot dogs in hopes that she will "wake up" really need to use our service too....

I fully believe that you feel that you need your kids to come and stay with us for a while cause, as you put it, parenting is hard and you need a break from the responsibility of parenting...but seriously buddy, I CAN'T HELP YOU RIGHT NOW....get it...that won't change no matter what names you call me, how loud you yell, or how many threats you utter about contacting my supervisor - actually go ahead he has a lot less patience for idiots like you....

Maybe if you thought about what happens when you stick that little joyhandle of yours in every chick that looks your way you wouldn't have to be sooooooo stressed out with kids.....

Stop yelling at me and getting on my ass cause I can't help you find some peace today man




That's it, that's all, return now to your regular bloggin fun kids....

Thanks Freak....

Where the hell have I been...or better yet - where the hell has he been...

Seriously - I'm speechless
At first I was in shock and laughing my ass off
Now the shock has worn off and I'm just really, really, really saddened (and a little bit scared)
I apologize to those who have witnessed this before but Christ, I can't look away..

I survived.....

Well kids, I survived the hillbilly weekend - with most of my braincells intact...I think...

I prepared myself for the conversations about trucks, crops, and the "who is doing who" talks, the tractor rides, the beer bottle cap races, and the ever so unforgettable sing song around the bonfire...

I even practiced speaking in one word syllables on the ride down but what I did not prepare myself for and remember to expect was.....the mayonnaise...

Why oh why does every food group at these shing - dings have to contain about 10 pounds of that digusting white goo...

We had every type of potato/macaroni/pasta salad known to man dripping in the fat laden "miracle whip" of your choice - I even counted 75 devilled eggs on the table

And if you just didn't get enough of the stuff in every sidedish there was tubs of the mayo stuff available to slop on your burger/hot dog/sausage - And most did!!

My pretty little greek salad looked so lost and out of place sitting there on the buffet (made from old barn doors) - just like me....

You know no matter how much I hate my life sometimes here - all it takes is that 5 hour ride back home to put what I have and where I come from all into perspective...

That and the fact that I can't stop shittin' mayo.....

Oh My Sir Bob.....

I love this man....really really love everything about this man...



You see back in the late 80's or so when I thought I wanted to change the world I read this....

I knew of Bob before cause I loved Pink Floyd and thought "The Wall" was cinematic genius (remember I was in my teens) so I was quite smitten before the whole live aid thing but then I read his book.....

Totally 100% fell for Sir Bob, lived and breathed his existance for awhile - no one else understood my attraction and thought I was a bit cuckoo for awhile - sure everyone admire what he was doing and thought the live aid thing was great but he was so much more for me...can't really explain it...anyhow...time marches on and well, to be honest, I forgot about Sir Bob...until yesterday..

There was an interview with him on this canadian show and well imagine my surprise..
This is what I saw..

Boy time has aged the old boy and my first reaction was oh my bob...
But then he opened his mouth and began to speak and sucked me right back in...god, I love this man.....let us remember him like this though...


Oh ya..if you want to comment and let me know what a bastard he is in real life - go ahead...for some reason I seem to be attracted to bastards.....

I wish.....

It sure would be swell if someone sang me the Rock Lobster song...make everything alright.....

Drip...drip...drip

too....friggin...hot....to...type...
must...go...to....
iceland...
I will never ever bitch ever again about being cold...this is hell

Anyhow the husband is back - notice my lack of posting lately - too busy fighting and feeling too depressed with life (I know boo hoo just leave the bastard already...)

Here's some exciting news - I get to spend the weekend with family that I haven't seen in 20 years and really have no desire to see for another 20 years - yes kids it's the hillbilly family reunion...yee haw..

Now don't get me wrong I truly enjoy and feel great affection for some of these "kinfolk" but seriously it'll take me the rest of the month to return my IQ to normal - and I ain't that bright to begin with....

A memoir.....

Okay kids, it struck me today that I should write a memoir - a la James Frey style..
You know the type that is based on a little truth and a whole lot a "creativity"

I'm thinkin that instead of it taking place in a rehab centre it could take place in an institution for the criminally insane - well, I work at a crisis centre - close enuf...eh?

The main character (me) instead of being an addict, I would be mentally unstable, not due to drugs and alcohol but because of torment suffered at the hands of a bastard of a husband... (hmmm... maybe too close to home)

And instead of it being called "A million little pieces" it'll be called "Four big chunks" cause that's how they find his body after I'm "finished" with it....

Wow the creative juices are a flowin' now...

And at the end instead of me losing the love of my life that I met at the "Happy Hills Resort", My love is a 25 year old strong, intelligent, gorgeous med intern (think Brad Pitt) who cures me from the psychosis I have been under during my ordeal and whisks me away to his home in the Mediterranean and we all live happily ever after....

Bestseller... Hell, Pulitzer...think movie deal... God I could be on Oprah!

Man I'm tired tonight...